Napping is the New Going Out

I don’t remember the last time I went out. I think it was in late summer on a patio in St. Paul. But most of my life for the past year has revolved around working from home, takeout, and naps.

Naps, you say?

Yes. Naps.

Now, I know that my friends who have young kids (all of them) are probably used to that term to refer to what their children need every day or else they get unruly. It’s likely not something they have time to do for themselves. My heart breaks for these people because my god I have been LOVING taking naps during the pandemic.

For starters, it’s free! There is no startup cost or equipment to buy. All you need is someplace that’s comfy. For me, it boils down to two spots: the recliner (classic old guy move) or the bed. Usually, the recliner is an accidental sleep. Since I’m almost 40, anytime I ingest food my brain takes that as a signal to sleep. You have to be careful with a bed though. You can’t go in there too late or else you’ll end up in a zombie-like state after waking. I also recommend not going under the sheets and just using a throw to keep yourself warm.

Secondly, napping is SO EASY! You literally have to do nothing. In fact, that’s the point of it! Just lay down and close your eyes. That’s it. Even a baby can do it.

The pandemic has impacted us all in different ways. Most significantly it has shuttered bars, restaurants, museums, and pretty much any other place you’d want to go. There’s so much time to do nothing. And since a person can only rewatch The Office so many times, there are going to be openings.

More productive members of our society have started new hobbies like knitting or sewing or reading lots of books. I haven’t done anything like that. Instead, I’ve focused my time on taking killer naps. Sometimes on a weekend, I’ll nap AFTER BREAKFAST! There’s no better start to a day than sleeping.

I know what you’re thinking: he sounds depressed. It’s something I keep talking to my therapist about, actually. I’m like “man, I love sleeping” and she’s like “how do you feel?” and I’m like “great! I’m asleep!” and then she kind of groans and I have to get serious. But really, I don’t feel depressed. Could I be? Who knows. That’s her job to figure out. All I know is I love napping.

Will this streak of mastering napping continue once we can socialize again? I sure as hell hope so. I’ve never been more rested in all my life. I do think, though, that I will be glad to see people again. I’m moving back to the city soon and will relish any chance to go explore. I envision late-morning brunches in the city and afternoons in my bed. The best of both worlds!

I’ll be honest, all this talk about napping has me tired. Best I go nap it off.