ANTIFA! Gesundheit
It’s everyone’s favorite new terrorist organization of the week: ANTIFA! You have to write it ALL CAPS and with the exclamation point! If not, it doesn’t sound as scary. It’s like the band Against Me!. The punctuation is part of the brand. Before we get hysterical and I end up on a watch list, let’s talk about what ANTIFA! is and what it isn’t. I am a world-renowned terrorist expert and sociologist so I am definitely the best person to talk about this. Seriously though, there are people with a lot more knowledge about this type of thing and you’d be smart to check them out. A good place to start is the Anti-Defamation League. Let’s have a fake q&a.
What does ANTIFA mean?
It’s shorthand for Anti-Fascism or Anti-Fascist. That it. But the right-wing media has made it sound exotic by intentionally mispronouncing it Antee-Fa! It sounds either Latinx or Arab. Kind of a mix of both. But it’s not a foreign word or group. It’s not really a group at all.
Wait, what? The Tangerine Tyrant said he was classifying them as a terrorist group.
Yeah, that’s not a thing.
It’s not?
No, not really. For domestic terrorists, which is how they’d be classified, it’s complicated. That’s why the KKK isn’t considered one either.
The KKK isn’t a terrorist organization?
Huh.
Yeah.
So why all this business about ANTIFA?
ANTIFA!
Sorry, ANTIFA!
They’re a convenient bugaboo for Trump to blame his mishandling of the situations on.
Where did they come from?
They’ve been around for a long time. Here is a group of ANTIFA! from the 1940s:
That’s cute.
Isn’t it?
That’s not the same. This ANTIFA! is looting and smashing windows. Those guys were stopping Nazis.
Well, that’s where ANTIFA! got it’s start too. They really rose to prominence after the “Unite the Right” hate rally in Charlottesville. They were one of the bigger groups protesting.
That’s the one where the girl got run over, right?
The one where the president also said that the Nazis were “very fine people”?
Yeah.
Ah. So why ANTIFA! now?
Well, the logic is kind of obvious. If there’s a group that’s against fascism, then ipso facto, they are down with fascism. That’s the Trump administration’s position on this. And with their behavior lately, like clearing out a park of peaceful protestors for a despicable photo op or using unidentified, heavily armed soldiers to patrol the capital, they are looking more and more fascist by the day.
Matt, stop being dramatic. If things were getting that bad, I’m sure someone would say something.
Like who? His former Secretary of Defense? A respected 50-year veteran? He did.
Yikes.
Yeah. Things are getting pretty serious.
The president said that ANTIFA! are “professional anarchists”. What’s that?
¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Another fever dream lie from snorting too many amphetamines? ANTIFA! does have varying degrees of organization, but it’s small pockets here and there. They are nowhere near as large or organized as the Klan or lots of other right-wing extremist groups. Some of whom are actually causing chaos and violence.
Funny, I don’t remember hearing anyone from the Feds saying that.
Well, you wouldn’t. Some of Trump’s biggest supporters are white nationalists and Nazis. That’s why they show up to all his rallies and buy his merch. By carrying out acts of terrorism like this, they can paint a negative picture of the protestors. The logic goes like this: look at how violent these groups are. No wonder we need so many police. And since they’re out of control, of course, the police will need to use force. If they didn’t loot and riot then they wouldn’t be in trouble. This confirms my implicit bias against dangerous minorities and reassures my faith in the police. Voila! That’s how it goes. How many times have you heard that defense?
Lots.
The truth is, we don’t really know who is causing the property damage, which is all we are talking about. The few killings there have been don’t seem to be connected to ANTIFA! but we will see. There is still a lot to be discovered and understood. Until a group claims responsibility for something it can be hard to tell what is real. It is entirely possible that it’s a misinformation campaign.
Do I need to be worried about ANTIFA!?
No. Of course, if you live in a city where these protests are happening (and I do mean IN the city like you can look out your window and see marchers) then there is always a risk of something happening. But otherwise, they are not going to hurt you. They aren’t interested in hurting you. Unless, hey are you a Nazi? Because if you are, then yeah, they really want to hurt you. It’s right there in the name!
Not a Nazi.
Good. Me either. Look, if you want to be afraid, go ahead, be afraid. But be afraid of the right thing. ANTIFA! is largely fighting the good fight. Are there bad apples? Yeah, especially in police departments. But we aren’t supposed to condemn all cops, right? (laughs maniacally)
Right.
Same for this situation. ANTIFA! members (if you can even call them that) are allies who want to change the system to prevent fascism from rising again. That’s all. But because Trump always needs someone to blame, he gets a twofer with them. First, he gets to blame the libs, and second, he gets to paint fascism positively. Win-Win baby.
Ugh.
Yeah. That’s how we all feel.